Help with separation and divorce

Not all relationships make it.

Sometimes, when there’s nothing else for it, marriages and partnerships end in divorce or separation and couples have to go their separate ways. If you have children, it’s important that your break-up goes as smoothly as possible to have as little impact on them as you can manage. Even if you don’t have kids, any relationship break down can affect all other areas of your life.

We have a range of services to help you if you’re going through separation or divorce.

Talking to your partner about the practicalities of separation or divorce can be difficult. If you’re a parent there are lots of decisions and plans to make for your children and in some cases couples just can’t agree a way forward.

Even if you have a good relationship with your partner, conversations about your children and money can result in arguments. In some cases communication can break down completely leaving you unable to come to a resolution. In all of these cases Mediation can help.

What is Mediation?

Mediation is different from Relationship Counselling as most couples choose to see a Mediator once their attempts to reach agreements have failed.

Mediators work with couples involved in family breakdown to make arrangements, either to plan for a separation or divorce, or once a separation or divorce has taken place.

Mediation can help to settle disputes over contact and living arrangements, child maintenance, property and money, without having to go to court, paving the way to a smoother separation.

In addition to parents, children can be seen on their own. Their Child Consultation helps bring their views and wishes to the table and often help parents make more informed decisions about the parenting of their children for the future.
It is a neutral and non-judgemental environment in which to discuss issues privately.

What can I expect in Mediation?

Mediation requires both you and your partner to attend the sessions. Mediation gives both parties the opportunity to talk in a safe environment and deal with the practicalities that come with separation.

Sessions last for about an hour and a half. There are usually around three sessions but there may be more or less, depending on the complexity and number of issues under discussion.

At the end of your sessions the Mediator will provide you with a document clearly setting out the proposals you want to go ahead with. This document is to enable you to take legal advice if you wish, before agreeing that the proposals are binding.

Fees are payable by clients on a sliding scale system that is adjusted according to their income, Mediation costs are significantly less than an often lengthy and costly court battle.

How can Mediation help me?

Mediation can help each of you put forward your point of view and be heard by the other, and help you to express your feelings without arguments. The mediator will explain legal principles, and explore and identify various options with you both.

Mediation aims to strengthen communication and help you to make your own informed decisions.

People who come to us for mediation tell us that they feel less stressed, more in control and have appreciated the support to reach agreement on workable arrangements rather than have decisions imposed on them by the court.

Success is something Relate Mid Surrey prizes, currently we have a high success rate over 80% of mediation cases result in a resolution.

The Mediator qualification

Each mediator will be accredited through the Family Mediation Council. They will have completed over two years training, with a minimum of 5 years practice and will be endorsed by the Family Mediation Council as holding the National Standard of qualifications for all aspects of mediation.

Relate Mid Surrey adheres to the Legal Services Commission, Mediation Quality Mark in all aspects of the mediation service.

Fee structure

Please see the costs page for more information on fees.

To find out more about Mediation and to book an appointment please contact Reigate 01737 245 212 for an appointment at either Epsom or Reigate.

Family Mediation Council Family Mediators Association